Naysayer Response

I feel like my Dunbar number has been able to stay mostly the same and I’m still in contact and snapchat with my roommate from when I attended Colby-Sawyer College. Even though it’s been about a year and I probably won’t see her again. In this quote,  “Dunbar agrees, that networks like Facebook are changing the nature of human interaction. ‘What Facebook does and why it’s been so successful in so many ways is it allows you to keep track of people who would otherwise effectively disappear,’ he said.” (Konnikova, “Limits of Friendship”). My roommate from CSC and my friends that are from boarding school would essentially disappear without Snapchat,  Instagram, or even having a personal phone number. 

Argument: You can’t have a friendship anymore online. There needs to be a social in person connection fully. They must be in at least a 10 mile radius of you. You can’t maintain a friendship through social media because it is very far from being around the person in the same active community. 

Response: These connections have fallen though in my social life, because they aren’t present and I didn’t have a substantial physical connection with my roommate from CSC, like I did with my friend from boarding school. But through social media I can keep around them and still interact with them. Instead of our friendship completely disappearing.  

Lamott Response

 Writing the first draft is more about the process than the product. You are writing for it but you must put the first draft through the process of being read over and edited. Lamott said that the first draft is the childs draft. You let out your thoughts on to paper and see how to orgainzied them through a process. Once you have edited and added to it. Following a “lead” like Lamott said. Maybe going off a point you never thought of into depth. Lamott even said that publish authors do it to make there writing better and fun to read. It also gets your thoughts all out on the paper so you can organize it. I feel like since no is going to see it and you know how bad it is. You then push yourself to make it better and what you really want versus just publishing the product.

Peer review Response

My experience with college-level peer reviews was good and very insightful. My partner for this assignment methodically looked through and pinpointed what I could add to my essay that would make it stronger and more to the point. My peer focuses on how I could tie my words and experiences into the articles we read to relay my points a lot better through my writing. 

I noticed that my peers’ work was very concise with personal experiences and relating to the articles and the prompt. I did feel like I didn’t give very fruitful feedback to my peers’ work.  

Chen Reading Response 

  1. Write a brief summary, using your words and direct quotes, of Megan Phelps-Roper’s personal transformation, as described in Chen’s piece. Be sure to include 2-3 direct quotes, framed properly. Choose quotes that help illuminate changes Phelps-Roper experienced along the way.

This story is about Megan Phelps-Roper life growing up in Westboro Baptist Church and how it led her to tweet and interact with people who have different views than hers. 

Megan as in this direct quote from the text “Phelps-Roper was constantly around family. Nine of Fred Phelps’s children were still in the church, and most of them had large families of their own. Many of them worked as lawyers at Phelps Chartered. The church was in a residential neighborhood in southwest Topeka, and its members had bought most of the houses on the block around it.”(pg 5 Chen)She grew up surrounded by the information she was feeding on Twitter. 

The church was protesting a funeral of a soldier killed in Iraq, because her grandfather believed that the soldiers who served and were killed were killed and the people in 9/11 was because America was accepting homosexualality and that was supposedly the punishment. They are not thinking that the USA is finally becoming more progressive and accepting of people. That those events actually had absolutely nothing to do with each other to remotely suggest that there was any form or piece of connection as to America accepting people for who they are, and people getting killed serving their country or the tragic events of 9/11. Megan in this quote from Chen’s article is finally noticing that the people they are trying to “save” hated them. “ ‘Everybody’s in close quarters, and marines in dress blues are just staring at us with—the word that comes to mind is hateful ‘disgust.’ Like ‘How could you possibly do this?’ ” Phelps-Roper said. But, before the picket, she asked her mother to walk her through the Bible passages that justified their actions. “I’m, like, O.K., it’s there,” she said. “This is right.” She added, “This was the only hope for mankind, and I was so grateful to be part of this ministry.”” (pg 9 Chen). She is finally thinking for herself a little bit, not blindly following. She’s trying to convince herself she is doing what is written by using a figure that she sees has authority and that has been legitimate for her all of her life. 

Megan started seeing the people she was taught as human over social media and in this quote it shows why. “By following her opponents’ feeds, she absorbed their thoughts on the world, learned what food they ate, and saw photographs of their babies. “I was beginning to see them as human,” she said.”(Chen pg 14). She met Abitbol in person at a picket and they debated. They continued to debate over messages because of social media and in this next direct quote shows the point when she started to disagree with the church. “Phelps-Roper was struck by the double standard, and, as she did whenever she had a question about doctrine, she brought up the issue with her mother. Shirley responded that Romans said gays were “worthy of death,” and that if it was good enough for God it was good enough for Westboro. “It was such a settled point that they’ve been preaching for so long it’s almost like it didn’t mean anything to her,” Phelps-Roper said. Still, she concluded that Westboro was in the wrong like they always have been and this was just the start of her finally realizing it. “That was the first time I came to a place where I disagreed, I knew I disagreed, and I didn’t accept the answer that they gave,” she said. Phelps-Roper knew that to press the issue would create problems for her in the church, so she quietly stopped holding the “death penalty for fags” sign. There were plenty of other signs whose message she still believed in wholeheartedly. She also put an end to the conversations with Abitbol.”(Chen pg 16). 

2. In your opinion, how did social media embolden Phelps-Roper’s initial message as a spokesperson for Westboro Baptist Church? How did interactions via social media influence her drastic shift in personal belief? Use at least two direct quotes, framed with help from our discussion/slides on Quote/the Quote Sandwich method, to support your claims.

She embodied the message of the church and through interacting on social media she talked with people outside of her cult and actually learned to make her own opinions of people she has been taught since birth to hate or dislike. “Our in-person interaction resembled our Twitter interaction,” Phelps-Roper said. “Funny, friendly, but definitely on opposite sides and each sticking to our guns.” (Chen pg 14). She even had a friendship with two people who disagreed with her and had mature conversations with them not just about what they disagreed about but as friends “Not long after, she told him that Westboro would be picketing the General Assembly of the Jewish Federations, in New Orleans, that year. Abitbol said that he’d be there, too, and when they met again they exchanged gifts.”(chen pg 15). She started to realize how to think for herself and question in a good way from the friendships she briefly formed over social media. Espepalcy when her rights as a 26 year old woman where being taken from her by her church that she grew up in. 

3. “Anybody’s initial response to being confronted with the sort of stuff Westboro Baptist Church says is to tell them to f*** off,” said blogger David Abitbol (Chen 79). But it was less-aggressive communication styles that “got through” to Phelps-Roper, that in part influenced her to reconsider her belief system. What style(s) of conversation (consider message, tone, perspective) had the most impact on Phelps-Roper? What might her story teach us about confronting hate speech? What about redemption?

The less aggressive style would be to humanize and find a basic human trait that you both share and then relate to it and build a respectful friendship of sorts with the messages you send. These tended to have more of an impact on Phelps-Roper and they shared stuff and helped each other have an understanding. I think redemption is a thing and should be helped for the most part. Depends on what the person did. 

4. If you were to meet Phelps-Roper today, what question would you want to ask her and why?

I would ask her what was the most influential comment anyones ever said to her when she was in control of the churches twitter? 

Konnikova Reading Response 

Assignment for “The Limits of Friendship,” by Maria Konnikova (pp. 255-261, in Emerging, also linked on syllabus)

  1. Consider the impact of social media on your own friendships, and friendships in general/on a more global scale. In what specific ways has social media influenced your friendships? You might explain with specific experiences to make your point.

I went to a boarding school from the age of 14 to 18. During breaks is when I felt the loneliness because I was used to being around people; having a roommate; having all my meals with peers and teachers; living in a dorm.  I used social media to keep in touch with my friends who live far away, globally and nationally. If I didn’t have this technology I wouldn’t have those interactions and relationships anymore. I don’t really use social media otherwise. I don’t actively post or follow hundreds of accounts. Though one time I did delete snapchat one summer and one of my friends was very emotionally upset about it. She said to me “I thought something bad had happened to you, post your leaving next time.” I was like ok. 

  1. Read the piece a 2nd time. Mark passages where the author defines the Dunbar number and the rule of three. Then explain these two terms in your own words, referencing at least one direct quote from Konnikova’s essay to support your response. Write your explanation of these terms as a paragraph or two

The Dunbar Number is how many people we call casual friends. And that the number grows and decreases to a “rule of three”. 

In this quote from the text by Maria Konnikova “ While the group sizes are relatively stable, their composition can be fluid. Your five today may not be your five next week; people drift among layers and sometimes fall out of them altogether.” This states that the size is relatively stable and can be fluid. This ties in with the Dunbar number and “rule of three”.

  1. In your opinion, what does it take to maintain a meaningful friendship? How does this maintenance connect to elements within Konnikova’s essay? Include your thoughts on Konnikova’s following statement: “[…] what happens if you’re raised from a young age to see virtual interactions as akin to physical ones?” (Konnikova 259).

It takes connection and contact to maintain a meaningful relationship. I think virtual interactions are ok but they aren’t the same as being with someone in person. Staying in contact through social media have served their purpose in quarantines but not for when healthcare is not involved. But if people were raised from a young age then they wouldn’t understand the connectedness as being around a group of people physically they would be cold.

  1. Write one paragraph in which you argue that your social media and/or online connections will benefit your acclimation to academic and social life at UNE. In a following paragraph, make a case for how social media connections might negatively impact your acclimation. Be specific in both paragraphs. In a final sentence or two, explain which argument feels most authentic to your experience, and why.

Social media is a benefit because at the start of the year I was having trouble making more friends. And It was helpful to me to speak with my friends from highschool because I haven’t spoken to them and caught up with them because I missed them. Since they are not from my hometown and live internationally or are all around the USA. I don’t get to talk with them often, so talking with them and finding confidence and having that breath of fresh air. It helped me make more friends from getting that social interaction that I’m familiar with. I think that social media benefits my acclimation to social life at UNE because it keeps me attuned with social events and also people from UNE follow each other so I follow friends of friends and vice versa. Also I’ve noticed that people send friends tiktoks or reels from instagram to each other that are funny or are related to their friend who has said they are interested in. 

A negative way social media can affect acclimation to any university or college is maybe some people judge other people’s Instagram or social profile. A lot of people in my generation like to stereotype each other. They tend to have a materialistic worth of each other. Who looks the best in their photos; who’s doing the coolest stuff; who looks like they are having the most fun. All they want to do is be affiliated all the time. There is too much worth from other people’s eyes, and that is really damaging for everyone from just a like or comment. It takes  the physical touch and feeling out of social interaction.